Blogtober #17 Friends

Throughout the bible there are a few occasions that stick out to me as far as good friends to have around. One of the many examples are three guys named Hananiah, Mishael, and Azariah. Within the lines of scripture they speak as if one. These guys were so hard to separate that others weren't sure who said what, so it was recorded as "they said..." or "they replied...". These guys worshiped God together and were willing to die together as one because of Whom they put their trust. They knew God could rescue them. They knew He was capable but they also knew that He didn't have to. They also knew that even if they died, that God was still in charge, so it was wise to listen to Him as to what was right and not to those who threatened to kill them. I want friends like this, who trust with the very fabric of their being, whether it gets them killed or not

Blogtober #16 Dad's birthday

 Today is my father's birthday. He would have been 79 years old today! It's weird to think about because my dad died when he was 59 years old, 20 years ago this coming April (2027). There are things I miss about having my father around. There are things that he has missed also, like his grandson and his daughter-in-law. I know that he would have gotten along with both!! While there are lots of things I miss about him being here there are some things I missed while he was still here. He was diagnosed with Pulmonary Arterial Hypertension in his mid 40's and we all thought he only had weeks to live, because that's how long my little brother lived after his diagnosis of this "rare" disease. It was difficult to go on walks and hikes after he was diagnosed, which is something I did almost daily in the hills near my house. At the time I was frustrated with what I thought was my dad just making excuses when he was suffering and doing his best. I'm glad that he hasn't had to suffer any longer and that he's fully well and I'm sure he's looking forward to his perfect body that won't give out! Until then, some of us still count the days and years that would have been, while still looking forward to what is!

Blogtober #15 Ramblings of Hurt

 Today I was reminded of a lot of opportunities that I have had over the years to play at churches as a drummer, guitar player, and pianist. Some of the times I can't even recall how I was requested to play there. I think of how I've been the worship leader on many church and school campuses and have been able to lead God's people in worship through song. I had the rare pleasure of being able to put an album together of the songs, the way we played them, for the church to enjoy on the go.  

So, as I play about once a month at my church as a pianist and every Sunday as the worship leader for the 4th-6th graders, it is difficult to keep in mind all the time that has gone by. When I first started going to the church of my own choice, the thing that drew me in was the fact that the church had a drum set for the junior high and high school group. It makes me sad that now there aren't really drums for that age group and that they don't have kids involved on the worship team to be able to help lead their peers. Sometimes I wonder if it's a matter of opinion or just a way for others to have control over them as the reason it's not the case today. The irony of the thing that brought me into the church is now the thing that is missing. Though if I'm truly honest, it wasn't the drums but The Spirit that brought me in. So, it makes me wonder if those in charge of those sacred places are relying more on presentation, performance, and (over)planning rather than The Spirit. I wonder if there just isn't any room for The Spirit to move, not that He could be kept out, but that He's not exactly welcomed in because it's not entirely convenient to be placed on God's timing. But, isn't that a part of submitting to His will...waiting on Him? I feel like leadership is trying to split the difference between God's timing and their own all while stating it's better to wait on Him, but not really showing how they are doing it in real time. It feels like if there's ever a place where they have to choose between trusting and looks, they err on the side of looks, meaning the way it will look or come across to others rather than how it will look to their LORD and Saviour. 

I have a frustrating day and I'm making broad, sweeping generalities about things I'm seeing from those in some leadership positions. As a whole, I like what my local church is doing, but also see some areas of improvement. I think the most difficult thing I struggle with is the area of trying to help others feel like they have a home and belong, while all the while feeling like an outsider who doesn't seem to live up to some standard that isn't even recommended in the bible at all. The other thing I struggle with is how much of this struggle is due to me and my bad attitude or poor perspective. Maybe the things I'm seeing have nothing to do with my perception of leadership but rather my own inadequacies and I'm projecting my issues on them. Maybe my lack of belonging has less to do with others and more to do with me. I have been praying for discernment to know the difference and I don't want to be quick to place blame, no matter how easy. I don't feel like God is giving me permission to go after anyone or to try and change anything in particular, which is what gives me pause as to where this sense is coming from. Today's entry is a ramble about how I'm hurt, but I'm not sure if someone/something hurt me or I hurt myself. 

Blogtober #14 Christmas Tune

 I've always wanted to write a Christmas song, because it's one of my favorite holidays and because God condescending into His own creation is the real miracle, the real magic of the holiday. While I know Christ most likely wasn't born in December, but probably nearer to Spring, I love the idea of celebrating the light coming into the world at the time when the world is at its darkest, or nearest the darkest time of year. The creation met its Creator face to face where the animals ate their food! This isn't just some weird detail. Jesus the Christ was born in a place called Bethlehem, which means "House of Bread." He is known as the bread of life and made referrence to how He is the sustanance that was provide in the desert, the daily bread. In the first passover when the children of Israel were escaping Eygypt they took the bread without yeast (yeast representing sing because it too puffs up) in kneading troughs, wrapped in clothes and slung them over their shoulders. The sinless one was also wrapped in clothes and put into a trough to one day be our permanent passover offering. The blood on the lental and door posts remind me of the bloodstains on the wrists and head for the One that takes all of our sins to allow us to be safe through His blood, but none of that happens if The Bread of Life wasn't placed in a feeding trough at the house of bread those 2,000+ years ago! 

So, depending on the speed and tone of the song I write it will depend on where I start to tell the story of the Creator, King of the Universe that was born to be our life giving bread and to offer us a way to enter into His home because of the cleansing of our sin through his blood...through blood/wine and body/bread.

Blogtober #13 Song Mapping

 Today I think I'm going to write about song mapping. It's like creating a storyboard or a map for a song, reminding the writer of where they ultimately want the song to go. I go through the idea of one of the songs I've already written at the end of the post.

Not everyone uses it; I don't always use it when I'm writing a new song, but it helps when you have an idea for a song but aren't sure where to start lyrically. It's also great to refer back to when struggling to figure out where the song should go from the part of the song that is stuck. I think in the coming days I might map out some songs that I still need to write for the Album Contest. 

When I was trying to write the song Unbreakable I only had the song's title and a roadmap in my head. I wanted to start with the narrator's experience and immediately transfer the events to his spouse. The choruses I wanted to change depending on where the song was or who it was that had been the voice in the song. The Bridge I wanted an epic battle idea, but changed my mind to a quiet firmness in the discovery of strength. I wanted the ending of the song to be the resolve, the breath of the song as well as the only time the title was said! That is what song mapping looks like to me. It's something I can come back to when writing out the lyrics and it feels clunky or confusing.

Blogtober #12 List of Songs

 Here are the songs (so far) that will be included on the album due in June 2027 (not in any particular order):

1) Well Done & Welcome Home

2) Unbreakable

3) I'm Still Here

4) Fully Wide

5) (Until I'm)With You

6) Karla's Lyrics My Tune*

7) Christmas Tune *

8) Tell Me Your Story*

9) Cover #1 (one of Caleb's Songs)

10) Cover #2 (Possibly Six Feet/Santeria Island Style)

Possible Extra-

11) Cover of THEM by PFR

12) The Mess

13) Split*

14) Glass*

*To be written still

Blogtober #11 Nashville Day #4

We started our trip at the Ole Smoky Distillery and we thought it fitting to end it there also. Karla and I decided that we would do the tastings again so we could get another $10 off coupon and spend it on things we wanted to get each other for our anniversary. I got Karla a backpack that she really wanted! While we were there Karla issued Caleb and I a challege to create an album that includes at least 10 songs total that has to have at least 8 original songs, 2 covers, one of the covers has to be the other's song and the other one can be their choice, one of the original songs will have to include lyrics provided by Karla, who will write a poem and Caleb and I will write our interpretation of it in music format. The album will have to be completed by June 30th, 2027. This all started because I was telling Caleb about the contest I started with my dad so that he would record his music before he died. So I guess I'm now in the same boat, trying to record any music that I may have left inside, as a lasting part of me for when I am gone. Our plane should land at around 8 pm and we depart at 5 pm. Maybe tomorrow I will start the list of songs I will include on my album.